If you are reading this, either you are forced to read this out of some obligation

or

you are curious to know this author’s view point on some of the following questions that keep coming to you from time to time.

Pondering questions:

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Who am I?

From where I came and why/how I came here?

Why my life is like this?

What is GOD?

Why GOD appear to be not kind to all?

What is supposed to be my goal in life?

How & when will I reach my goal?

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Over several thousands of years, there are so many scriptures answering all these in their own way.

There are and were people who clearly understood the answers by their own experience & realisation.

Some understood by reading the scriptures and analysis.

Some understood by following a master’s guidance.

Some though not understood, faithfully believing what is said.

Some though not very sure, just follow the crowd to be on safe side.

Some vehemently deny one theory and strongly support a different one.

Some are not fully convinced with any of the proposed theories, but not have any opinion on what is the right answer.

Some don’t care about these questions at all and take life as it is, with their current set of priorities.

Some are keeping all options open and doing their research to evaluate the merits of a given theory.

My attempt is only for this last category. Even that is not to teach them something.

I too pondered over these questions and by chance read some scriptures, heard some discources and made my own observations.

I got a particular understanding of all these happenings and that gave me a lot of relief and so just want to share the same with some intellectuals to solicit their feedback.

Let me confess some things here:

I have not read much and so may be giving the same viewpoint as already given somewhere and widely accepted.

I have not read much and so may be giving the same viewpoint as already given somewhere and clearly proved to be wrong.

I am not a regular writer, so not good at putting my thoughts in a proper flow to make this easy or interesting to read.

I am not a regular writer, so may not be able to communicate what exactly I intend to.

My command on language is very poor, so there may be tons of grammar and spelling mistakes.

At some later point in this or a follow up article, I’ll answer following two questions that you may want to get answers from me.

Is there any authenticity to what is explained here?

What sources made me believe what I believe to be answers to the above questions?

One reason for deferring that for now is the hope that, you may not care to know those later,

either because you are convinced with my theory or you totally rejected this and not interested in knowing that at all.

OK. Let us go into the discussion…..

To get answers to any of these, we need to understand the pre-creation stage where there is no universe, no material, no nature.

All that is there is GOD.

The state of GOD is not a person, not an object.

GOD cannot be described in any language as all languages are built around treating every thing as a person or an object or an attribute.

Every moment in a language is time dependent (past, present or future).

Any definition involves dimensions, physical or behavioural attributes.

GOD is a Super soul (“paramathma”) and has no form. Not made of any material. Just peace, ecstasy, bliss, consciousness …

In the beginning (actually, it should not be said as beginning, as pre creation state is a timeless state), super soul was the only entity present.

It is wrong to say super soul as an entity. But my limited vocabulary has no term to define the state of super soul, so taking liberty to refer as an entity.

Such soul at its will, in a moment generates – out of itself – multiple tiny, infinitesimal soul-lets (again each is a complete entity with no form, not made of any material. Just peace, ecstasy, bliss, consciousness …)

In another moment will merge some of the soul-lets into one other soul-let or merges some or all the soul-lets back into super soul.

The closest analogy for that could be sparks raising out of fire and falling back into the same fire.

All that is a divine play with no specific cause and no expected effect.

For the sake of convenience, I am repeatedly using the term moment, which may not make sense, when there is no concept of time at all.

However, let us assume a moment is an instance during which a soul-let arise from super soul or merge into super soul or an instance where one or more soul-lets merge into one.

All soul-lets in that super soul are joyous, playful and blissful in each others company.

No dearth of anything. There is no distinction between super soul and a soul-let.

There is no need for any soul-let to leave super soul and in fact, there is no where else to go.

Every soul-let is in union with super soul.

Every soul-let is in union with a fellow soul-let.

Every soul-let is in union with itself.

There is no hunger, no thirst, no anger, no mistrust.

All bliss, all joy, all happiness.

No soul-let has a unique identity. No shape, no name, no color, no attribute that differentiates one from the other.

All that is there is just momentary split and momentary union.

No identity, no ego. No attachment, no detachment.

No strength, no weakness. No work. No fatigue.

No competition. No winner, no looser.

No respect, no disrespect. No hatred.

All that is there is unconditional, limitless, immeasurable love, care & sharing.

There is nothing else to do than just be with other and so no priorities.

There is no difference being with one over other as all are same and so no preferences.

No external threat. No internal conflict. Each is surrounded by every other. No privacy. No need for privacy.

No soul-let is in a hurry. None is looking for its own space.

No learning. No habits.

No boastings. No show-offs. No fear. Nothing to shy away.

No, No, No no nothing.

Every soul-let knew everything that it is supposed to know. Every soul-let knew that, that alone is everything for everything else.

The mere presence of a fellow soul-let is enough to keep one stimulated. And there are uncountable such around each simulating each other to ecstasy.

When in such a stage, in a very defining moment, GOD emanated “mind” and applied that onto one of the soul-lets.

GOD probably noticed that soul-lets are emerging from and withdrawing into super soul and have a joyous existence as long as they are present, but are not communicating with each other or with their own self or with super soul.

GOD might have observed that though souls are in a great escatsy, they may not be aware of their feeling.

And GOD probably brought out mind as a medium that facilitates such communication and awareness of happiness.

For now, let us not question why & how GOD produced “mind”.

And also not question why chose to apply to a soul-let, and how a particular one is chosen and what is the process of applying such “mind” to that.

On the influence of that “mind”, that soul-let started enjoying and “thinking” as to what it is?

It almost went into a transe. Withdrew itself from happenings around it.

When in such stage, in few moments, it forgot itself and the association with other souls and super soul.

To help that soul regaining consciousness, GOD emanated “intelligence” and made it available to that soul.

Several moments later, soul started searching its origin and several more moments later with the grace of super soul, mind got in contact with intelligence, there by got enlightenment and realisation of its source.

Let us leave for now, what is constituted in the mind that could effect such a transe, and what is it in that intelligence that brought back the GOD consciousness.

For all such questions that are left open, I owe an explanation and certainly will touch those at some point.

Part reason for leaving that for now is that, I just do not want to divert the attention of reader from the main questions.

Another reason is my lack of skill to put things in a proper flow, so as not to bring any confusion in the mind of reader.

And finally, actual reason is, I am not sure of the right answer to some of them as yet.

Now that the soul got mind and intelligence, GOD communicated with it and inquired how was the feeling.

Soul narrated the experience of how it felt lost and how wonderful a feeling to get back to absolute consciousness and be back with the master.

More than pain and frustration while lost, what a thrill it was to get back after a momentary separation.

That is when the first WISH started in the soul, possessing mind and intelligence. A wish to play “hide and seek” with its master.

Soul expressed the will to play. GOD, ever willing to fulfil the wish of whoever and whatsoever sought, was ready to game.

However, as there is no distinction between super soul and soul and its emergence and merging back into GOD every moment, hide and seek is not an easy way.

To help soul have some identity, GOD brought out ego and made it a companion of soul along with mind and intelligence.

Now, soul though there is no form, shape and any other characteristic attributes, just armed with ego, started a feel of individuality.

Still, there is no way GOD can hide from the soul as the soul is with a pure mind, intelligence and GOD consciousness and all pervading GOD is right around it.

Soul then made another wish to GOD – to momentarily hide from the soul.

With great hesitation, GOD created an illusion, false ego (“maya”) to act as a curtain to stand between GOD and soul.

Soul felt the missing of GOD and with the help of mind & intelligence regained GOD thus having a great hide and seek game.

This continued for several iterations. Soul slowly started loosing the thrill of it as every time a curtain is there, with not much trouble, mind & intelligence are defeating false ego and tearing the curtain apart, clearly revealing GOD.

Soul made another wish, more profound this time, to make the curtain much thicker, to add many more hurdles in the path to reach.

GOD is visualising the consequences of this and tried to convince the soul, not to fall trap to such.

Soul, remembering the initial thrill and wanting to get same or more than that, persisted.

GOD surrendered and in a master stroke created elements air, water, earth etc and built an illusion of universe with them all within the super soul.

Gave free will to soul to make any shape out of those elements and reside in them.

Also gave soul the power to multiply itself and enter into any.

A new level of game started with soul along with fellow souls started the play.

Ever loving GOD started supply of energy to them, made some demi GODs to guide and help the souls.

In the form of “Veda”, explained the souls and its mind and its intelligence how not to get into the trap of false ego, how to wish demi GODS what they want, how to help each other and be in union with one other.

How to invoke GOD and come back whenever they want.

Souls followed all these guidelines in toto and had some joyous moments for self.

Co mingling, communicating with fellow souls in other forms is still the same as when they were with no form and just soul-lets in super soul, though to a lesser degree.

Time and again, returning to GOD, frequently communicating with the master, things are going in a great way. All is well.

GOD gave senses and sense organs to the bodies so that they perceive and appreciate and enjoy the beautiful universal resources around them.

GOD gave mind, the power to interpret all these sensory impulses and guide the body holding the soul.

GOD directed intelligence to understand what is good, what is bad and mediate between mind and soul, not loosing consciousness.

With mind & intelligence strictly obeying the guidelines of GOD, there is not much of an opportunity for the false ego to be a thick veil and soul is easily getting back to GOD.

If for some reason, false ego could entice mind and make it dormant or misleading for a while, GOD the super soul used to rush and alert the intelligence and turn the soul back to GOD consciousness.

Again game lost, thrill missed.

Souls, moving in various bodies were still seeing each other as same, as each is just a reflection of GOD.

They approached GOD via demi GODS to further complicate and differentiate the souls.

GOD brought out three attributes “satva”, the softness much closer to the true nature, “rajasa”, the passion and “tamasa”, the ignorance.

Made beings food dependant, and induced these attributes into food, so that based on what they eat, they get different combinations of these attributes and behave accordingly.

With those in play, minds started developing different tastes, bodies different colors each having their own set of identities, likes, dislikes.

In a very defining moment, soul, under the influence of false ego and a tamasa mind state, wished GOD some boons.

BOON 1:

A boon that GOD will not absorb the soul unto the super soul (halting the hide and seek), unless soul accompanied by the mind expresses its willingness to merge.

BOON 2:

Soul indicated that it may have one or more wishes while hiding from GOD, and GOD shall absorb soul back ONLY after all desires and wishes are completely exhausted.

BOON 3:

Further complicating the process of home coming, boon was also sought from GOD to communicate with soul ONLY when it asks for.

BOON 4:

In the grip of false ego and a heavy dose of “tamasa” and some “rajasa” mind state, a boon was also sought to let the soul along with mind, intelligence, ego, senses, elemental material bodies etc. to learn & live by itself with no interference from GOD, even if GOD sees suffering of the mind due its own actions, inactions, wrong actions and desires.

Soul knows very well that real happiness, bliss to it is when it is absorbed in GOD. It was trying just to prolong the duration of separation, not knowing where it is likely to lead.

GOD made the promises and gave a word to abide by those in all conditions.

There comes the concept of time, space, directions, materials, feelings, experiences, possessiveness, selfishness, greed and all that…

Minds started making wild wishes, GOD fulfilling them easily. Intelligence is dominated by mind and its thoughts and desires.

Gradually, the complexity of multiple minds making conflicting wishes made it into a scenario where a soul has to leave one body form and take a new body just to get one of the wishes fulfilled.

And while in that body, along with the companionship of mind, making new desires and taking new births.

From then on, though every soul is within the reach of super soul, was never able to go into that eternal self from where it emerged, and where its real belongingness is.

Wandering in wild, knowing that it is searching for something, but not sure of what it is searching for going through the cycle of birth and death, soul is a confused being.

GOD being a silent spectator to this following the soul in the body in all its births and rebirths, awaiting for the moment when intelligence gets upper hand, keeping mind silent and letting soul realise where it belongs to.

At any given point, GOD is ensuring that happening events are the sum total of all wishes by minds of all living beings with best possible outcome.

Thus, living beings are inviting their own sufferings, totally forgot where real happiness is, forgot the presence of GOD and needless to say, how to get back to the initial blissful state.

From time to time, GOD committed to the promises, not directly able to take corrective action is sending many signals in the form of saints, messiahs, holy scriptures as to why one is here and what to do to reach where soul is supposed to be at.

With this as the life theory, I am convinced that I got right answers to the questions

Who am I?

From where I came and why/how I came here?

Why my life is like this?

What is GOD?

Why GOD appear to be not kind to all?

What is supposed to be my goal in life?

How & when will I reach my goal?